You’ve been dating the same person for six months. You think you’re ready. You think they’re ready. You purchase condoms, but is that all you need to do in order to be responsible? What defines responsible sex?
While some people may say that teenagers aren’t responsible enough to handle sex, some students feel otherwise. A few sexually active students have decided to define responsible sex with their experiences.
“A lot of girls say that they wish they waited,” senior Natalie Gold said. “I don’t feel that way.”
Gold said that she was dating her boyfriend, who she is still dating now, for about five months before they made the decision to have sex.
“Emotionally, it didn’t really change anything, because we were already pretty close before,” Gold said. “It just added to how close we already were.”
Another sexually active student, junior Dillon Leary, said that sex did change the relationship a little bit emotionally for him.
“Over time, it didn’t really affect the relationship, but at the time it made it a lot more serious and definitely made us closer,” Leary said.
Leary said that although sex brought about some changes to the relationship, it wasn’t something that was an obligation.
“Sex was important, but not a requirement to stay in the relationship with her,” Leary said.
Gold agrees with Leary about the level of importance of sex.
“Sex was exciting, but it wasn’t the focus of our relationship,” Gold said.
Sophomore Micheal Penn also agrees with Leary about the level of seriousness brought to the relationship after sex became involved.
“[Sex] made the relationship more serious, and it made us more compatible,” Penn said.
Penn said he is still dating the person whom he first had sex with, and that they waited about four months before deciding to have sex.
“I was a little worried at first,” Penn said. “I didn’t want to have a baby.”
Despite his worries, Penn said that he feels his decision to have sex with his girlfriend was a good one.
“Sex is great when you’re in love,” Penn said. “Sex wouldn’t be as good if you weren’t in love with the person.”
Leary agrees with Penn and said that his first experience has shaped his view of sex overall.
“If it had been a one-night stand, I probably would have had sex with more people,” Leary said.
Leary said that he is still dating his first and only partner.
“Because of my first experience, I think I’d want to be in a relationship with my future partners,” Leary said.
Gold agrees.
“There is definitely a difference between being responsible and being safe,” Gold said. “You can be safe while still being irresponsible.”
While Leary and Penn said that using protection is the best way to be responsible, Gold disagrees, saying that more is involved.
“You should always use protection, but don’t just go to a party and have sex with some random guy,” Gold said. “Make sure it’s someone you trust and feel comfortable with.”
Gold added that it’s a good idea to get your parents involved.
“Don’t be afraid to ask your parents for birth control,” Gold said. “It’s worth it to be on it, and your parents will see that it’s a good thing that you’re being responsible about [sex].”
Gold, Leary and Penn all feel that it’s important to have a good first experience in order to keep practicing responsible sex.
“For the first time, you should probably be in a relationship,” Leary said. “After that, I guess you can choose your own path.”
Penn agrees.
“Wait until you think it’s the right time,” Penn said. “Don’t rush it. Usually when you rush, bad things happen.”
